Balancing real world issues with the many long hours that are required to coach a rugby team sometimes takes a lot of effort and can lead to us asking the question, why is it that we coach?

But occasionally, you meet someone or an event occurs, that leaves you in no doubt why you coach.

I first came across Jacob Rierson in the fall of 2008, when I was Head Coach at the University of North Carolina. He was one of about 15 rookies that had joined the club that semester.

On the 4th October, we were due to play Fort Bragg at their base about 2 hours drive south of Chapel Hill. Jacob had never played rugby before arriving at Chapel Hill and by the time the Fort Bragg game came around he had only played 3 or 4 B-side games at hooker.

That week at training, we were a little light on front-row players and I was thinking of playing Jacob.

Fort Bragg is a men’s Div 3 side that is obviously very fit and can be very physical. But I had seen something in this young man that made me feel confident he could handle the physicality and that he was ready to join the A side.

There was a quiet, unspoken determination that was very impressive.
Game day came and for once I was able to bring my family to the game as well.

It was a hot afternoon and after making sure my wife and two children were settled, I went about getting the team ready to play.

After the match I came back over to where my wife was sitting. She had made friends with some spectators and family of the players that had helped look after our girls.

My eldest daughter is very intolerant of the heat and sun and some of the spectators had helped provide some shelter with a tent.

Jacob Rierson

One of the ladies turned out to be Jacob’s mother, Mrs. Patricia Rierson. Along with her other son, Kaleb, she had come out to watch Jacob play his first A side game.

She thanked me for coaching the team, and said she was very happy to be able to come out and watch her son play for UNC as she lived nearby in Fayetteville. We won the game convincingly, packed up and went home after a great day of rugby.

On the Monday morning, I was preparing that evening’s session at Chapel Hill when I came across an article online, which appeared in the Fayetteville Observer.

The story led with a photograph of Jacob, his brother and mother. It was the 15th anniversary of the death of Jacob’s father.

Sgt. First Class Matt Rierson was killed in Mogadishu, Somalia on the 6th October 1993.

Having led the first assault team into Mogadishu, in what became know as the ‘Black Hawk Down’ raid, Sgt Rierson returned several times to the city throughout the battle frantically trying to rescue friends and recover the bodies of fallen comrades.

Having survived the battle, Matt Rierson was killed by a mortar round that hit the compound two days later.

Having read all this, I was extremely moved by the courage of not only Sgt Rierson, but also by the manner that Jacob and his family were coping with going about their lives.

I had heard nothing of Jacob’s father or the fact that it was the 15th anniversary of his death, or that his father lies in the cemetery at Fort Bragg, where 15 years later (almost to the day) his eldest son would be playing against soldiers from the unit in which he served.

No one had said anything about it, Jacob had not asked to be picked for that team to play Fort Bragg and his mother had just acted as any normal parent, proud to be there watching her son play for his college team.

That evening at practice, very respectful of Jacob’s privacy, I pulled him over to one side and had a short conversation with him.

As well as telling him that he had played well on Saturday, I also said that I had read the article that had appeared in the newspaper.

I said that not only was everyone very proud of his father, but that I was certain that his father would be very proud of him.

This is why I coach.